I am in a happy place in life right now. Everything in my life is surely not perfect, but I am happy. As I sat down to write about this topic I realised that I am lucky indeed to be living the life I am right now. I am a woman in 2017 who is living life on her own terms. It may not be a bed of roses, but this is my happy place and I revel in it. It brings me immense pleasure to share that I, along with 24 other bloggers are celebrating #9daysofwomanhood throughout Navratri. I thank Harneet Khurana for setting the stage for me. I loved her blog Sublime Messages on the prompt for today which is Being a Woman in India in 2017. Continue reading
Category: What’s new? (Page 4 of 6)
Pregnancy! That beautiful time when everyone around you will feel free to launch into elaborate discussions about what to eat, read, think and breathe too. And the one thing that everyone also told me was it’s ok to formula feed, it doesn’t harm the babies, “I mean look at our babies. They are doing just fine aren’t they?” Sadly, much of the generation previous to ours relied more on formula milk than their own breast milk. So there is a serious dearth of people who will give you first-hand advice about breastfeeding. But one Facebook group is changing that.
I am greatly indebted to the group on Facebook called Breastfeeding Support for Indian Mothers. Without it, I don’t think I would have been breastfeeding at all, forget extended breastfeeding.
Breastfeeding Support for Indian Mothers (BSIM) is a peer-to- peer support group for breastfeeding parents, their partners and family members. With more than 50,000 members the Facebook Support group aims to help parents who are at various stages of their breastfeeding journey, ranging from pregnant to those with older children following natural term nursing. Even though the group is primarily targeted towards the Indian diaspora, it has members who are from various countries across the world.
I was lucky that a friend who had just had a baby introduced me to BSIM and said I had to join the group. In my mind I had thought “what was the need for a group to help women breastfeed? Didn’t it just come naturally to a new mother?”
How wrong I was! For when the gates to this support group opened up for me (read: my request to join the group was approved.) I was astonished to see that many women had issues, some minor or some complex, with this natural act of breastfeeding. The group wall was painted with queries from women all over India about their breastfeeding experiences.
Reading these scared me. The joy and mirth of pregnancy took a backseat for a short while and I did lose some precious sleep. But I also thanked my stars that I had arrived into the group at the right time and used the opportunity to soak up all the information that the group administrators, moderators and expert mothers were sharing.
I also came across a myriad myths and hearsay that new mothers were being subjected to by ill informed people around them. Some were amusing & some plain ridiculous. Motivation came in the form of mothers who shared photos of their breastfeeding milestones – 6 months of exclusive breastfeeding, 2 years and even more. I internalized all this information and even supplemented it by reading up resources such as La Leche League International and Kelly Moms, references to which I again found on BSIM.
Today BSIM is a 50,000 strong group (and growing.) They are now a registered non profit organisation. “When we started off, I don’t think we expected it to become this big,” says Adhunika Prakash, the founder of BSIM, “But now, as the group is growing at a very fast pace, we understand that it is a big responsibility and we are trying to ensure that the parents who are part of the group get the support and advice they seek.”
BSIM’s biggest concern when it comes to breastfeeding is “the ubiquitous marketing of Artificial Baby Milk (ABM) that hampers the breastfeeding relationship in most cases. It is everywhere, on TV, on hoardings, beautiful displays at supermarkets, and unfortunately, even doctors sometimes advocate formula before addressing the breastfeeding concern. A breastfeeding solution can be found, but most jump to artificial baby milk at the first instance.” In an attempt to change this BSIM has designed a petition highlighting how hospitals & healthcare professionals do not seek consent before administering ABM to newborns. You can be a part of this mission by signing the petition here: https://www.change.org/p/ministry-of-women-child-development-make-it-mandatory-to-get-parents-consent-before-giving-artificial-baby-milk-abm?recruiter=749722294&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=share_email_responsive
BSIM today is crossing many strides as it partners with healthcare professionals and reaches out to many people across the country via live events. However it is still that cosy group of mothers who have found joy in breastfeeding and now continue to support and encourage each other. So if you are a #momtobe or know someone who would benefit from being a part of this group, ask them to join rightaway. They will thank you for the tip.
If you are looking for more breastfeeding inspiration, I highly recommend the blog by this talented mommy Priyadarshini Panda who blogs at Rattle Babble Battle. She has captured her beautiful journey here: My Breastfeeding Journey
I honestly did not think about how long I would be breastfeeding babyT before we started. But now that we are still at it at 20 months, it seems like the most natural thing to do. He is still my baby and I am still feeding him valuable nutrition.
Toddler breastfeeding has its own dynamics and every day can still spring surprises. Feeling like you are “feeding a new-born” is common even after the child has turned, say 15 or 18 months. Toddler Breastfeeding is still about providing valuable nutrition to the child, as much as it is about providing comfort, soothing and helps tide through the necessary ills of development spurts, teething, viral, etc. But breastfeeding is a boon at these times. Nothing can pacify a confused, cranky toddler like the mother’s breast can. Selfish or lazy, you say? Well, no. I call it my superpower.
This blog post was written as a special feature for KidsStopPress on the occasion of World Breastfeeding Week 2017. You can read the full article here:
One Mom’s Honest Account on the Joys & Struggles of Toddler Breastfeeding
I spent almost a decade in the Human Resource function and of that a considerable portion in recruitment and staffing. Please don’t be disappointed to see a very unusual analogy here. I can explain. Almost every HR specialist has read a book title “The first 90 days” and how it impacts the success of a new recruit or a newly elevated leader. And I live by this book. Most of your lives early experiences will largely determine how well you fare in those areas. And the same goes for the early breastfeeding issues.
New mothers need to see successes in their early breastfeeding days in order to have a journey that is fulfilling and satisfying to both her newborn child and herself.
And of course, as you would have with most things in life, it is the early breastfeeding days which are most challenging. Most of the breastfeeding issues begin here. Sadly, when most people tend to give up. While it is true that a little perseverance and determination can get most people through any challenge life throws at them, breastfeeding is different. It is combined with a woman who is bearing the severe trauma of childbirth, is a muddle of hormones and is probably fielding a myriad of opinions & statements on how she should be raising that little being that may be less than a day old even. Breastfeeding doesn’t come naturally and is hard. Continue reading
Having a child has made me so much more aware of all the elements, experiences and perceptions that will shape the mind of my little babyT. I am constantly looking out for and watching what I say and do to him and to others in front of him. Right now he is under my wing, but tomorrow he will step out into the big, bad world and meet a new battalion of people in the form of friends, teachers etc. I cannot really control these influencers. Just thinking about it sends my head into a tizzy and I am sure it would be just as confusing for young minds. Continue reading
I love the Monsoon season. I love the thunder showers and the endless downpour and then the lush green of the Earth that springs up. Much like our theme for this month’s We Are Real Moms challenge: Nourish, Nurture & Flourish.
A few months ago when Nikita of Being Mamma Bear asked me if I would like to co-host the We Are Real Moms (WARM) challenge with her in August 2017 I was overjoyed. And when she told me she chose me for this particular month because the dates for WARM coincide with World Breastfeeding Week I was more than over the moon.
My journey of motherhood has been most unexpected. From an unexpected, almost miracle pregnancy to the unexpected joys of breastfeeding I have been surprised and thrilled at the little marvels I see every day. That’s why I love talking about these experiences! I love sharing the joys I was able to experience, hoping that I would inspire just one more mother to feel the same.
I will be honest and tell you, I did not believe I would be able to breastfeed. But I did and I still do breastfeed. I chose to have faith in my body and that if I trusted my body and my baby, I would be able to let the two build their own breastfeeding rhythm. But I also did not know that something as simple as breastfeeding would be hard on me, physically and emotionally. There are days when I am at my wit’s end and constantly seeming to only feed my now toddler son at the breast. I want to scream, tear my hair out and yell at someone on such days. But then I do see my son recover almost overnight from mild colds and virals, gain valuable nourishment from breast milk even when his body refuses to eat any solids and I know I have a special gift and I must treasure it. My gift has been being able to Nourish his body and I believe both our hearts by way of breastfeeding.
My wonder with the term Nourish did not end there. BabyT turned 6 months & I was a little sad that he would need more than just my milk to nourish him. I wrote about my feelings in this very early post on my blog here. We chose to follow baby led weaning and luckily it went smooth sailing for us from there. BLW is messy. It is a time-consuming process. It is scary most of all. However what it is not – effort intensive (no separate food cooked for baby), inconveniencing (no purees in mixers, blenders or grinders) and definitely not location binding (best for travelling with babies.)
Nourishing the spirit & soul is as important as the body and here comes Nurture. While I did not babywear my newborn, I waited eagerly till he turned the right weight and height so that I could wear him in my full buckled carrier. Here we are in our Tara Turquoise from Anmol Baby Carriers in one of our first outings.
The joy I experienced in having my baby close to me, him feeling comforted in new surroundings and the bonding we felt together has been a blessing. I am really glad I found babywearing.
Nurture has also taken us beyond just babywearing. One of the greatest joys of being a mother has been seeing my baby develop from not knowing that he is a separate entity to him learning the ability of his hands, legs and five senses. His first moments are recorded in my mind & heart (and phone, of course, hahah) for ever. As we grow up we tend to take simple every day things for granted. But watching a little baby struggle, understand, try and then perfect a new skill is a wonder.
BabyT’s family
I also learned that babies are hard on relationships. Surprised? Yes, I certainly was. It strains relationships and distances people. Not out of spite, but just out of not having time or energy to nurture and nourish anything else apart from BABY. Sometimes it seems like you and your spouse are living on two different planets or maybe even galaxies. You may be the best parents together, but are you coupling? Keepin’ it very real here. Now that babyT is approaching 2 swiftly, I felt it is now time to look out on the world and retouch base with all those relationships relegated to the background – my own parents (and in-laws), friends (married, married with kids, single et al.) and above all MY OWN SELF. I choose to now flourish.
Nourish | Nurture | Flourish
So all through this month’s WARM challenge, Nikita and I are going to talk about and push you to Nourish, Nurture & Flourish. You’ve read my interpretation of these 3 prompt categories. You can read what Nikita has to say about the theme on her blog: BeingMammaBear
I now look forward to hearing about yours. How has your journey with Nourish been? Was breastfeeding hard? Did you choose to give your child formula milk? Did you follow traditional weaning or BLW just like me? What were the joys you experienced? I want to hear it all. If you have a new baby, are you finding personal relationships hard right now? And if you have gone past this stage, how did you rebuild your connections and your own self. 🙂
I am super excited to begin this journey with you. Do follow me on my Instagram account: Mommyingbabyt to be a part of #WeAreRealMoms’ August challenge.
If you have been following my blog or my accounts on social media you would know that I am a die hard fan of cloth diapers. I discovered the concept of cloth diapers when I was pregnant. My first thoughts were that they were like nappies or langots as they are called in India. I imagined them to be fancily designed langots and laughed at all the women going nuts about them. Like really?
Until I discovered what cloth diapers were really all about. And then I became one of those moms who was going all ga-ga about them. I then spent the last two months of my pregnancy reading up all I could about cloth diapers, the materials, how they worked, the wash and care routines, sizes, types. I was intrigued by how the basic concepts like multi-layering of fabric, and material with wicking properties were being used to build effective tools to hold bodily extracts – read: baby pee & poop. I was sold, hook, line, and sinker for cloth diapers.
I have written several posts about cloth diapers on my blog.
If you want to understand what is a cloth diaper and how they work, read my post on My First Cloth Diaper.
Cloth Diapers are essentially diapers made of cloth, and as such safe from harmful chemicals, fragrances and plastic/ paper. Like disposable diapers, they are totally waterproof and leakproof. They have great capacity – can use cloth diapers overnight too. However unlike sposies (as disposable diapers are known) cloth diapers are washable and hence reusable over and over again. That one diaper will last you till potty training is done.
However, I felt that they lacked structure and somewhere I skipped the basics. So all this month I am going to be talking about cloth diapers and sharing information and my expertise. Topics for the blogs will range from a basic 101 guide to cloth diapers and then help you build your stash. I also want to talk about a very common problem that most people face with cloth diapers and that is getting the perfect fit and sizing. Lastly, I do see a lot of new parents and caregivers adopting cloth diapering but shying away from using cloth diapers at night or when out of the house. I want to give very simple and doable solutions to this category. While I respect everyone’s individual choice to follow something as per their convenience and comfort, I really want to urge them to at least try and then decide if it would suit them or not.
So stay tuned all of this month. Is there any specific topic you would like me to cover about cloth diapering? Let me know in the comments here.
Raise your hand if the moment you discovered you were pregnant you decided that you would do everything possible to care for and protect the little bean slowly growing inside you. And now raise your other hand if you suddenly found that none of the bath and body products you were using felt safe or natural to be used during pregnancy. Hey you look a little silly with both your hands up. You can relax and let me tell you about these wonderful company which makes great products. Its called The MomsCo and its one of the first Indian companies which makes bath and body products for Moms to be and new moms. Continue reading
BabyT has been an early talker and his vocabulary consisted of 20 odd words by the time he was 1. He could identify most vegetables, fruits, animals and birds. No, he was not born with this skill. It was something he acquired. How did we do this? Books, a lot of them. But largely it was do with Flash Cards. Our positive experience with Flash Cards convinced me that this was a great way to learn for babies. It stimulated the right skills and so learning happened very quickly. And when I heard of Quantum Cards by Brainsmith I was stunned to see that this was a well researched and thought about product. I was sure flash cards would do #babyT a world of good. But more than that I was intrigued to know how Brainsmith did their Flash Cards differently. Continue reading
All aboard, My Parenting Mantra! Hop on to the Blog Train and come along with me and my fellow mommy bloggers as we share My Parenting Mantra. Some super mommy bloggers will be driving this train over a month. We promise to bring you some enriching insights into our lives and maybe some that will add to your own parenting experience.
Before that, a big thanks to Misha who captured her Parenting Mantras at Freshly Baked Head for introducing me. Meet all the blogger moms who are part of this blog train here.
My Parenting Mantra – Trust & Faith
Like most first time parents, we entered the world of bringing up babyT with a blank slate. Sure we had read all the What to Expects, and Dr Spock from cover to cover and waited for the weekly updates from BabyCentre. But we did not really know what lay ahead of us. Or how we would fare in the practicals.
And to top it, being a mother makes you super paranoid. You are always concerned whether your child is weighing enough, eating enough, developing enough, learning to walk, talk and the whole shenanigans that come with. But this is where I learnt a big lesson that nature is bigger than any of us put together. And that we must just TRUST Her to do Her job.
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