Mommy T's adventures; bringing up Baby T

Tag: working mom

Building inclusion from the home

As the debate on same sex marriages rages in the Indian courts, it’s not just the nation but the world that watches with baited breath, on what the outcome and the aftereffects are going to be. But more than this, what is really evident is that the world is a truly diverse place, and every individual has a right to live a life of dignity and safety, experience love, and joy. What role then can we as parents play in ensuring that our children who will come in to this world a decade or two down the line, don’t have to fight for basic rights but will thrive where there is mutual respect and love?! This thought plays in my mind every time I watch or read the news these days. Moving into a role at work that focuses on diversity, equity, and inclusion has only made this a more pressing need for our family – how can we raise our child to be more inclusive?

Here are some ways you can help children be more inclusive:

1. Teach them about different cultures: Children should be taught about different cultures and traditions from a young age. This will help them understand and appreciate the differences between people. Truth be spoken India is a very diverse nation, isn’t it every 50 kilometers that we get to experience a different dialect, food habits and traditions? But experience shows that we are not as tolerant as that. Judgments based on caste, coloyr, backgrounds, religion, and so much more divide us. Is it because we are made to only see ourselves as superior and reject every other reality out there? It baffles me sometimes. But judgemental we are for sure. How about we be more open and revel in our variety instead? Let our children see that diversity is to be celebrated, not resisted.

2. Encourage them to make friends with people who are different from them: Encourage your child to make friends with people who are different from them. This will help them learn about different cultures and perspectives. Thanks to the cosmopolitan society most of us live in, we do get to experience social relationships with people from different categories. But look deeper – how many Muslim people do you work with? Or live in the same apartment complex as you? Have you heard of landlords rejecting renters who are single, Trans individuals, or Muslims? I’ve heard of it much too often and moreover because of the role I play in my organization. Let’s look at the behaviors we model and allow our children to observe and be better people themselves.

3. Teach them to be kind and respectful: Children should be taught to be kind and respectful to everyone, regardless of their differences. This includes being respectful of people’s beliefs, cultures, and backgrounds. There is no debate on this. The world definitely needs more people to be kind. This behavior certainly begins at home.

4. Model inclusive behavior: Children learn by example, so it is important to model inclusive behavior. This means treating everyone with kindness and respect and being open to learning about different cultures and perspectives. We can’t play dual lives where on the one hand we treat people with judgments and unfairness and expect future world citizens I.e. our children to be better individuals than us.

5. Break the biases: Do gender biased notions come from behavior that our kids are seeing around them in the home environment. Are women still seen as caregivers/cooks? Will Alexa and Siri continue to subtly ply the message that a woman (voice) will hear your command and act on it? Hard hitting if you think about it, isn’t it?

6. Talk to them about discrimination: It is important to talk to children about discrimination and how it can hurt people. This will help them understand the importance of being inclusive and standing up against discrimination. Equip them with mechanisms to deal with bullying and unkind behavior and, most importantly, not shy away from taking a stand and backing their friends when attacked. The “My what goes?” (Mera kya Jaata hai) attitude has killed far more spirits than war, I am sure!

In conclusion, helping children be more inclusive is important for creating a more accepting and diverse society. By teaching children about different cultures, encouraging them to make friends with people who are different from them, teaching them to be kind and respectful, modeling inclusive behavior, and talking to them about discrimination, we can help create a more inclusive world for everyone.

I quite enjoyed writing this post today. And it comes from the heart. As a follow up, I’ll write about some more practical ways to build inclusivity. Do come back for more. ????

Working moms – take care of yourself

Are you a working mom? Don’t put self care on the back burner. Self care for working moms does seem hard to come by doesn’t it?

If you’re a mom, odds are good you have a very, very busy life. Pew Research confirms it. Women today are spending more time working than women in the past, while also spending more taking care of children.

Unfortunately, some other necessary changes haven’t quite kept up with these shifts. Surveys tell us moms are still the ones most likely to be saddled with the housework, even if both they and their spouse have full time jobs.

That could mean you have trouble finding time for self-care. While that’s understandable, it’s still important to address your own needs. You can’t take care of all your daily responsibilities if stress gets the better of you. (Not to mention the simple fact that working as hard as you do means you deserve to treat yourself.)

Luckily, there are ways to practice self-care for working moms. You just need to remember these essential tips.

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5 ways how being a working mom helps me

(And that in turn helped me become a better mom)

Five years ago when I decided to quit my career, spanning a decade, I thought my tryst with the corporate life was done with. I wanted to invest myself in launching my freelance career and find time for other passions (writing, this blog, yayy.) If you had asked me then (as many people did) if I would return to work some day I vehemently told them I would never, ever!

My most important agenda then was having a baby. It wasn’t easy for me to conceive. I conceived pretty late in life (if you want all the gory details, simply visit my About Me page here.) I wanted to bask in all the glory of motherhood and its shenanigans of pee, poo, milk, diapers (cloth of course) and early learning. And I did all of that. For most part of the time I was a stay-at-home, that is.

My son, babyT (ok, fine toddler T) is 3 years old as I write this. He is growing up. He is developing his own personality. He is an individual who is learning to be independent and responsible (er, sort of.) And I have just returned to work. Incidentally this month marks my 3rd month in full time employment and it looks like I might be enjoying this ride, which makes it safe for me to write about it. 😛

However, the months preceding my return to work, have been the most bleak.

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10 year challenge – what changed for women at the work place

2019 is a big year for me. Firstly, 2019 is the year my husband and I complete a decade of being married. I also turn a big milestone age. Most importantly 2019 marks the year I return to work. A return to the corporate world, which I thought i had left far behind and would never return to.

And in the midst of the #10YearChallenge that has been taking the internet by storm recently, my post today also puts into sharp contrast two periods – 2009 and 2019.

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Healthy home cooked meals on busy workday mornings

Busy, workday mornings mean chaos in the kitchen. There’re multiple lunch & snack boxes to be packed for three people – my toddler son, my husband and I. And breakfast is sacrosanct too. As a family we really believe in home cooked meals and this continued even after I joined full time work.

The one thing that makes it all happen is PREP or if you are fancy (or watch MasterChef Australia), mise en place. 😉 Food ingredients are washed, chopped and stored the night before. In the morning the contents are ready to go into the pan and cook into fresh, healthy meals for all of us. This ensures that all the cooking – breakfast and lunch boxes is done in under an hour. In fact, we also get time for a sit-down family breakfast every morning.

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Back to the grind: return to the corporate world

I joined full-time work this week. After a career break of 5 years, I joined the world of the daily rush, 10 to 6s, working lunches and formal office wear. All of those I could ease into and even look forward to maybe. Except for the last one – formal office wear.

For the most part of the last 3 years, I have been a mother (and pregnant before that) My wardrobe, therefore, consisted of loose T-shirts that enabled breastfeeding, pyjamas that I could just jump into and run to doctor’s appointments, school pickups and playground play-dates. I had never imagined that choosing to go back to work would mean a dilemma of the biggest order – what to wear to the daily grind?

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