Z is for Zeba

For today’s final post for the #AtoZBloggingChallenge Z is for Zeba our nanny. 

Let me introduce you to Zeba. She is a 20 something woman, who manages her own home and mine. She is the reason I am here everyday, with some amount of sanity and energy left in me to blog and to allow me to pee/ poop/ bathe/ have one cup of coffee in peace. Zeba is our nanny. She minds babyT in the day time. To me she is a big savior who has allowed me to bring in some degree of normalcy to my life. 

Let me give you a background: I am a double graduate and then an MBA and worked close to 10 years in the corporate sector. Quitting my job and staying at home, there was no baby on the scene then, was a very big and difficult decision for me. But I do know that if I had not quit and worked wholeheartedly on my health and happiness, I would probably not have been able to conceive and have a baby. So it worked well for me in the end. But once this “goal” was accomplished, somewhere behind all the elation, wonder and excitement, a thought gnawed at me… “What am I doing with my life? Do I feel valued? Am I enriching myself and my mind so as to give the best to my child?” You see having a baby and taking care of one is more than a full time occupation and add to that the zeal (that begins with Z too) of exclusive breast feeding, strictly cloth diapering, co-sleeping, and some more elements of natural parenting and managing home and hearth too and doing this ALL ALONE without another person’s physical support throughout the day (hubby had just changed his job after T arrived and needed to focus on the new role, but of course chipped in when he returned from work each evening), you have a lethal combination. One which will be best for you and baby in the long run, but one that can drain you of all energy and sometimes sanity.

So, soon after babyT turned one, we decided to hire a nanny for him. I work from home, I freelance in HR and wanted to refocus on it, now that T was one. However, I found that the only way I could focus was if I had help with managing T and all the elements around him. It was then that Zeba entered our lives.

Zeba is a young woman, she doesn’t have children of her own yet, but she is eager to learn, is sharp and picks up things fast. Her strength lies in the fact that she is educated and can therefore read, write and speak in English, this is a big relief for me as T loves to read at least 10 books in a day and some of them on loop. Zeba was unable to complete her education and so cannot find employment in the corporate world but she loves what she does at our home. She comes in around 9 am and till early evening, spends time with babyT – playing, fixing up meals and supervising him while he eats, reading to him, being a companion to him and also assisting me in laundry and other baby work. While babyT sleeps, we both grab a cup of tea and chit chat about my blog, my Instagram feed (she has more followers on Instagram than I do right now. 🙂 and her household. I am always around the house, I don’t really need to go out very often for meetings. All my work is possible over the phone and email. So I am still a hands on mommy to babyT but I can now relax a bit and do my daily rituals on time and have some energy left at the end of the day to blog/ plan for the next day/ get some much needed rest and sleep.

Most importantly I am a better person now because I am not frustrated, “hangry” and smelly. I don’t look like a tornado hit me. I am at significantly reduced risk of developing kidney stones. hahaha. I am sane and have some creative thought left to spend on how I can enrich babyT’s daily life with books, activities and fun. This was something which I was just not able to do earlier. There was no time or energy to focus on the value adds. My blog for one has really taken off since I have had time on my hands. I took on more work assignments, not for the money, but it really helped me touch base with the outside world once again. I dared to take on this #AtoZ challenge because I knew it was doable.

So this final piece for the #AtoZBloggingChallenge is for all the Zebas in our mommy lives, who allow us to breathe, live and laugh a little bit more. 🙂

Edited to add on 29th December 2017:

I had to let Zeba go today. She was caught stealing money from my wallet. I had also been missing a lot of money of late. When we discussed it within the family, a lot of other members who live in this household or visit from time to time also confessed that they had been missing money. We also had circumstantial & video evidence to prove that Zeba stole the money. And by way of accumulating this proof, I also discovered things like her eating from the same plate and spoon as babyT while I was in the restroom or bathing. More than her stealing money, her stealing food from a baby’s plate is what ticked us off and we knew we had to let her go. Pro Tip: If you’re hiring househelp or nannies pls instal a nanny cam.

I spent a lot of time in remorse last night. I was in a dilemma whether to ignore the incident or confront her. Weird that I can harbour a thief and a cheat but I treasured the relationship she had built up with my child. Well, visible part of it anyway. I shudder to think how much food and nutrition she may have been depriving him of all this while. Not to mention exposing him to viruses and colds etc.

This is the last time I hire a nanny for helping me manage my child. What’s outsourceable will still be done. But none of it which involves another person – a stranger, having responsibility for my child.